


head in my hands (it's all in my head)

by justsomespam



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Gen, i can't tag this i'm sorry, the tw's are in the beginning notes
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-20
Updated: 2021-02-20
Packaged: 2021-03-15 13:28:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29559831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justsomespam/pseuds/justsomespam
Summary: If you asked Dream what events had led him to be chased by three weapon-wielding maniacs, he wouldn’t tell you. Probably because he was busy trying to escape from said maniacs.
Relationships: Clay | Dream & Sapnap (Video Blogging RPF), Minor or Background Relationship(s), They're all platonic
Kudos: 14





	head in my hands (it's all in my head)

**Author's Note:**

> TW// use of possibly offensive names for the mentally ill, very, very poor representation of a mental institution (it's not really an institution, but it's called one) - If you find my portrayal of a (sorta) mental institution offensive, let me know and I will take this down immediately
> 
> Round Two: Dream's Backstory

Besides the birth of the universe, the evolution of humanity, and other, omnificent events like that, he’d probably start with the time he beat a kid black and blue. 

He was five at the time, and some seven-year-old chump had done something to provoke him. He doesn’t remember exactly what it was the other kid had done, but he knew it _was_ provoked. Hence the fight. 

Although, sending a kid to the hospital wasn't exactly the thing that started everything. The real reason things ended up the way they did was that his stony five-year-old face had no regret painted on it. It was the fact he knew he nearly killed somebody and didn’t say sorry. 

Dream thought it was pretty simple at the time. Somebody was being mean to him so he hit them until they stopped. It’s what his parents did to the toaster when it was broken, it’s what the older kids did to people they didn’t like. There was nothing to apologize for, if the other kid didn’t like it, he should’ve hit back harder. 

(He didn’t realize it at the time, but this was a sign of everything to come.)

Violence was power and Dream accumulated power. Dream thought it was that simple, but his parents clearly did not agree. That’s why, when he was ten years old, he was shipped off to a mental institution. 

They weren’t so crude as to call it an institution though. He was sent to “Mojang’s School for the Exceptional” while he was under the guise it was a boarding school for children and teens. It wasn't a bad cover, it made sense for him to pursue more advanced and specialized instruction considering his ability. He was smart, always had been, and it made the other kids dislike him. That was fine though, he didn’t care about them anyway. 

The “school” was five stories tall and very large. After a day at the institution, he had come to the conclusion that the three main wings came together to form a triangle. It had a massive cafeteria and a gymnasium at two of the corners. Wings of smaller rooms filled up the space between. The rooms included everything from computer setups, to bedrooms, to science labs. In the centre of the triangle, there was a community garden, that apparently everybody shared, although Dream had yet to see anybody use it. 

In fact, Dream had yet to see anybody at all really. There was a man at the front desk who gave him a map and a pamphlet. He could count the number of people he spotted wandering the halls on one hand. While entering the cafeteria one day, he saw someone around his age exiting. He didn't realize how rare that was until much later, but, even if he knew, he wasn't sure if he would've approached the boy. After touring the place, it wasn't hard to come to the conclusion that everybody here was a lunatic or a nurse. He knew what he did to get in and, quite frankly, he did not want to encounter anybody like himself. Avoiding everybody would be the best way to go about things.

And so, three years passed uneventfully. Dream met Puffy, who was his assigned nurse. She was oddly mothering to Dream, and while he didn’t mind it, he couldn’t say he liked it. 

Dream was only a patient, after all. Puffy, even if she lived at the institution, had her own, sane, life. She was bound to leave him behind eventually, so there was no point in getting attached to her when getting hurt was the only foreseeable outcome. 

That’s how a lot of things worked around Dream. He was going to stay at the institution, or someplace like it for the rest of his life, whether he liked it or not. Getting attached to trends, to things, or to people outside of the institution wasn’t a good idea because they’d always move on without him. 

Dream devoured all the books he could in those three years. He was smart, and oh-so bored, living at the institute. In the morning, he would wake up, eat breakfast, and read until lunch. Then he would play cards with Puffy, use his daily computer time, go outside, and read some more. By the time Dream was thirteen, he had advanced to tenth-grade material and showed no signs of stopping his extreme learning streak. 

There was monitored “playtime” outside for an hour a day, which didn’t really feel like enough, but Dream wasn’t complaining. It used to be only 30 minutes before Puffy had petitioned the mysterious Mojang for more time. 

Mojang was what Dream called the owner, or caretaker, or headmaster of the institute. Because the reclusive authority never seemed to be around, Dream didn’t know if Mojang was his real name, or even if he _was_ a he. Every notion about the person behind the institution was purely guesswork or came from Sapnap.

Sapnap knew a lot about how the institution worked, he said he got the information from his assigned handler. Sapnap was also his oldest and best friend, he was the one who gave Dream his name. His nickname, anyway.

Dream met Sapnap on his thirteenth birthday. He spotted other residents fairly often but never bothered with talking to them. It never escaped his mind that everybody was here for a reason. Dream didn't need to start anything with another resident, much less a scrawny boy standing outside of the library door at two am, holding a mess of blankets and looking like he hadn't slept in a year. Dream really didn't want to accidentally pick a fight with a sleep-deprived and likely maniacal resident.

Sapnap did not have the same reservations about Dream. Just as the latter was turning around, chalking up the library as a loss, the blanket draped resident called out to him.

"What's your name?"

Dream tensed at the question. Normally, if he ignored others, they ignored him in return. It would probably be best if he kept walking. He kept his eyes fixed forwards as he marched, determined to walk away from the interaction. His plan was foiled, however, when he heard footsteps behind him. 

Dream quickened his pace.

“Hey, stop walking. I just wanna talk.” A voice echoed in the dim hallway. Dream’s heart sped up, it was clear the other wanted a fight. 

His sloppy speed-walk sped up into a run. He was pretty fit, and the guy following him was loaded down with blankets. There was no way he wouldn't come out on top.

To his surprise, the blanketed boy seemed to have no trouble following him. They quickly exited the library's light range, the dim and empty corridors only adding to the intense atmosphere.

The few times he looked over his shoulder the boy was nearly on his tail. Through the glimpses, he took note of the boy's features. He was lugging a thick blanket with panda faces printed on it. The black and white of the blanket blended in with his black and white layered clothes. His dark hair was barely long enough to flop against his forehead, although the white bandanna wrapped around his head might be affecting that. It was hard to tell when they were moving, but he seemed to be a little shorter than Dream and maybe a little younger too.

After a couple of minutes of flat-out running, it was pretty clear the boy wasn't giving up chasing Dream. In fact, he had started to taunt him, telling Dream to "come here" and that he was "going to catch" him. Since physical strength wasn't working, Dream was going to have to come up with a strategy.

Trying to weave through the smaller rooms was out of the question, there was a chance that another resident might be in one of them and getting in trouble for sneaking out was arguably worse than being caught by the guy chasing him. There wasn't anything wrong with continuing through the hallways, but the hunt wouldn't be ending in one of them, their evenly matched physical prowess made sure of it. That left the gym and the cafeteria to provide refuge. 

His hood falling off startled him out of his thoughts. He sucked in a sharp breath, the air getting caught in his throat when he saw the boy's outstretched hand only inches away from where he had yanked it down. The smile on the other resident's face formed a laugh as Dream faced forward once more. Thinking quickly, he sped up by a small increment, just enough widen the distance between them by a foot before veering to the side and knocking over a trash can. Dream was able to easily leap over it, but the boy behind him wasn't so lucky. "Ha!" He barked a breathy laugh when he heard a string of curses erupt in his wake. As expected, it didn't stop the dark-hair boy for long, and huffs from both filled the air after only a moment. 

His stamina was depleting quickly, it was a good thing he was nearing his destination. His plan wasn't foolproof, but it was the best he could come up with at the moment. As the heavy metal doors to the cafeteria came into view, Dream prayed to all the gods he didn't believe in that they were unlocked. With one last burst of speed, he reached for the nearest door and used all his strength to throw it open. To his delight, not only was it unlocked, Dream had managed to throw it open in his pursuer's face.

Once inside the huge but cluttered space, Dream wasted no time finding the best way to distract the boy and escape. He dodged and weaved around the tables and chairs at full speed until he felt his lungs would burst. 

He ducked under a table to take a quick breather. The cackling calls of the blanket boy had died off a couple of minutes ago and Dream hoped his trail had finally been lost. 

Suddenly a large and thick length of fabric landed on top of him, obscuring his vision. “Aaargh!” A loud war cry came from above and Dream’s back was forced to bend under the weight of another human. 

Crap. Dream quickly kicked the blanket and it’s owner off, crawling backwards to escape its clutches. Before his opponent had a chance to tackle him again, Dream launched himself forward, landing hard on the linoleum tiles. 

While straddling the other boy, he entangled their legs, effectively trapping his pursuer underneath. The blankets, which had been useful in cushioning their fall, were now hindering the boy below from moving his left arm. His other arm was pinned down by Dreams left.

Dream dug his right elbow into the boy's windpipe, grinning a little. For as strong as the boy underneath him seemed, it was surprisingly easy to take him down. Then again, Dream knew how a desperate man fought, which meant he couldn't let his guard down.

He tensed when his opponent tilted his head back. Would he spit on him? "It wouldn't be the first time," he thought with a grimace. Instead of the dreaded phlegm, a groan escaped the boy's mouth. 

"Uncle. Uncle!" 

A wheezy gasp escaped the boy's mouth. "I yield, now gerroff me."

Squinting uneasily, Dream leant back. Best case, he’d get to brush himself off and they'd part ways, never to meet again. This could also be a ruse, and the other was planning to jump him the moment he was let up.

The boy struggled to sit up, his left hand was still trapped in his blanket. He nearly fell over when he went to push himself up with the confined hand. As soon as the boy was relatively upright and had both hands free, they flew to his own sternum and he let out a string of breathy curses and coughs. 

The wheezing devolved into chuckles as the boy massaged his neck. "Dang, you play rough." Play? Like a game? The guy balled up his fist and gave one more rough hack into it before arranging his panda printed blanket, and patting a spot beside him. "Sit down. You never did tell me your name."

Dream scoffed. “Really? That’s what you’re concerned about?” Nonetheless, he settled next to the dark-haired boy. Even if this really was some elaborate trap, Dream was curious enough to ignore the warnings. If worst came to worst, Dream was sure he could handle the boy, their scuffle earlier proved it. “Tell me yours then, if names are so important.” 

The boy crossed his arms and gave a playful pout. “No way. I asked you first.”

"Then I'll give you a name. How about... um..." Dream's sentence trailed off as he scrambled to come up with an appropriate name. His eyes darted around their surroundings before landing on the blanket they were sitting on. "How about Pandas?"

"Pandas? That's so lame." 

A mock offended gasp came from Dream. "Well, if Pandas is so lame, what do you suggest?" He watched the other shrug and released a sigh. "You can't just veto my idea if you don't have any ideas of your own."

"I can too." The dark-hair boy argued. They were both silent for a moment, brainstorming. Dream was the one who broke it. "How about we compromise? We keep Pandas but we turn it backwards so it sounds cooler."

"That would make it... sad... napdas... sadnap?" Dream's brow crinkled at the result. "That just sounds like you take sad naps or something." Sapnap considered it for a moment. "How about Sapnap? Y'know, so it rhymes."

"Sapnap... that works. It doesn't make you sound depressed at least."

Sapnap considered his new name in silence. "What about you?" he asked after a couple of minutes passed without conversation.

Dream didn't really think hiding his name was a big deal, but he wasn't willing to back off quite yet. Instead, he changed the subject. "Why are you out and about? The curfew was two hours ago."

The other took the subject change gracefully, shrugging his shoulders in response to the question. "Snuck out while BBH was distracted. You?"

"Uh, same, I think. My handler was asleep. Is BBH the name of your handler?" "Yeah." After a questioning look was thrown his way, Sapnap elaborated. "It's short for BadBoyHalo." The questioning look turned into one of bewilderment and Sapnap realized Dream had no idea what he was talking about. "Do you know anything about the staff?"

"...No." Dream was reluctant to admit this potential weakness, but Sapnap didn't seem like the person who would take it and run.

"Okay, so, none of the handlers or nurses use their real name around us. During their initiation that all made nicknames for themselves." Sapnap shifted how he was sitting to face Dream, as the latter considered the new information. He supposed Puffy was kind of an odd name and Sapnap probably wasn't lying about something like that.

"Every resident is supposed to have an assigned handler, but not every handler has only one assigned resident. Um, I'm pretty sure you already know this, but depending on your behaviour and age, you get more and more freedom." Sapnap tilted his head as he considered what else he knew about the inner workings of the institution. "All the handlers are hand-picked by Mojang, and they get tons of money for babysitting us."

"How do you know all this?" Dream had asked Puffy a few times but she was very tight-lipped about what she did outside of working with Dream.

"BBH tells me. If you want, I can ask him some more questions." 

"Oh-"

Sapnap shushed Dream mid-sentence. “Do ya hear that? It’s DadBoyHalo,” he whispered. 

A muffled voice floated through the air from the main entrance of the cafeteria. Another, clearer voice, came from the same direction. "Nooo, Geppy. I can't just call his name, he'll run away." There were some more muffled noises and a sigh sounded from the person who must be BadBoyHalo. "I don't know, but I can't do that. Let's just say goodnight so I can search for him silently." Louder noises came what must be a speakerphone. “Skeppy, this is important to me. I could lose my job over this.” A pause. “Okay, I’ll see you later. Good night. Love you.”

The disconnect tone echoed through the now silent cafeteria. Dream heard some mumbling and shuffling just as a bright beam of light revealed the table next to him and Sapnap. 

“So you’ve gotta go now.” Dream startled at the low voice in his ear. When he looked over, he saw Sapnap’s silhouette leaning towards him. “We’d both get in trouble if Bad caught us together. You need to leave.” There was a tug on the blanket underneath Dream. “Hurry.” 

Dream quickly scrambled off the panda printed fabric and surveyed the best way out of the situation. If the handler was moving towards them one meter every two seconds at a forty-degree angle and his peak flash flashlight range reached fifteen meters then... Rubbish bins provided cover approximately eight meters from the second door... 

As he calculated his route, Sapnap gave him a gentle shove. “I said hurry. Stop muttering about angles and just crawl under the tables.”

Dream complied, a faint blush dusting his cheeks. “Yeah, alright. Guess you don’t want to feel stupid next to me, huh?”

The dark-haired boy paused in folding his comforter to shoot Dream a mock glare. “Ha. Ha. Now shoo, for real.” He looked back down at the fabric in his hands before snapping his neck up once more. 

“Oh, and, meet me at the library again, okay?” Sapnap whisper-yelled at Dream’s retreating back. Dream didn’t reply, as Bad was coming very close to their location and he didn’t want to give them away. 

“Oh! There you are! You muffinhead.” 

Dream quickly ducked behind the trash cans he had spotted earlier, internally mocking Sapnap for dismissing their importance. He slowly peered around the side of the receptacle, taking in the scene from only meters away. 

Both faces were shrouded in shadow but Dream had a pretty good idea what Sapnap’s looked like when he replied. “You know you can cuss, right? I’m twelve, not two.”

Band’s voice quickly rose to a defensive tone, proclaiming, “That doesn’t mean anything! I’m much older than you are and I still don’t swear.”

There was a scoff. “Yeah, that’s ‘cause you’re lame. At least Skeppy swears.”

A noncommittal hum came from the taller figure of the two. He seemed to be wearing a dark overcoat of some sort, with red accents. Maybe Bad’s where Sapnap got his horrible fashion sense from. Dream did his best to stifle his laugh at the image of Sapnap posing in front of a mirror, showing off to his handler. He had known the other for less than a day, but the thought was already so ridiculous he couldn't help his mirth. Unfortunately, he wasn't able to completely muffle the noise coming from his mouth.

“What was that?” Bad’s tone was sharp, not at all like the genial one from before. 

“What?” Ah, Sapnap was playing dumb. It occurred to Dream that it would probably help if he didn’t have his head sticking out from behind the rubbish bins. It obviously occurred to Sapnap as well, if his frantic hand flapping was of any significance. Despite knowing he should duck back behind the cans, Dream listened to his urge to see what Bad was doing.

“I thought I heard you talking to someone before I found you. I don’t need to report somebody, do I?” This was clearly a rhetorical question, as Bad was already swivelling his flashlight around, and taking a couple of paces towards Dream’s hiding spot. 

A bright beam of light suddenly blinded him and he immediately ducked back behind the bins, internally berating his curiosity for keeping him exposed. 

Heavy footsteps were already nearing the far side of the cans when Sapnap called out to his handler. “Wait! You’re not going to report somebody for breaking curfew tonight. You can't.” 

Dream wondered if Sapnap really had enough sway over Bad to convince him not to do something that seemed really important to him. He knew Puffy liked him, but she had a strong moral compass and Dream had never been able to convince her to break the rules before. 

Maybe he was just buying Dream time. Bad’s footsteps had stopped, Dream had at least a couple of seconds of time before Bad eventually reached him. He hastily crawled under the nearest table, hoping the dark gave him enough cover. 

“And why I am going to completely disregard the one thing I came here to do?” Bad sounded suspicious but stayed where he was while he waited for an answer. Dream crawled to the next table, only three more to go. 

“Because if you report somebody, you’ll have to explain how you caught them. And I’ll have to tell them how you slacked off so you could flirt with your boyfriend.” Dream couldn’t see Sapnap’s face but he could imagine the devilish smirk it held, especially while putting emphasis on the word “boyfriend”.

He should’ve known blackmail was the answer. Blackmail was similar to violence, albeit a sneakier way of gaining power. When Dream was ten, he got in fights all the time. Now though, he knew he didn’t need to use violence to get what he wanted. Sapnap clearly knew too, which meant he was smart. Along with Sapnap's fun personality, similar age, and overall "normal-ness" Dream could almost feel himself longing to get closer to the other resident. It was a new feeling for Dream, one he didn't have time to unpack during the high-intensity situation he was in. Focusing on the elder's body language, Dream could tell Sapnap's teasing had the desired effect, distracting him from the blackmail, and therefore confusing him too much be suspicious.

“Wha- Me and Skeppy are not dating,” Bad sputtered. He held his hands in a defensive position, with the flashlight beam pointed straight up.

Making use of Bad’s disarray, Dream made a mad dash for the door, bypassing the last three tables altogether. 

Sapnap’s laughter and Bad’s protests echoed through the empty hallways as Dream ran through them. It wasn't until he had a decent cover story and an empty dorm to hide out in, that he let his own laughter bubble up. He just made his first friend. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> how did insanity become one of my crutches

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you, [Xali_Ali](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xali_Ali/pseuds/Xali_Ali), for inadvertently reminding me this does not need to be a one-shot and I can use chapter endings to avoid transitions
> 
> Thank you, [dre_amer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dre_amer/pseuds/dre_amer), for inspiring the title. It has nothing to do with the story, but everything to do with the comp
> 
> They are both really cool authors I look up to, you should check them out (if you haven't already)


End file.
